Call me weird
Published July 21st, 2008Dr. Becky Smith, the psychiatrist, seated herself across from Twisted DNA. After a quick hello, she came straight to the point. Looking at Twisted DNA intensely, she asked, “Why are you here?”
“They think I am weird,” said Twisted DNA, “and I want to find out…” She didn’t let him finish the sentence. “Who are they?” she interrupted.
“I should have chosen a male psychiatrist” Twisted DNA muttered to himself.
“My blog readers,” said TD
“You have a blog? A real one with real readers? Not imaginary?” She inquired. Dr. Smith seemed convinced that Twisted DNA was off the rocker from the get go.
“It’s a real one! I am not that nuts yet. You can check it out at twisted-dna.com”
“Twisted DNA? That’s a wacky name. Why did you choose that name?”
“Because that’s my name”
“You call yourself Twisted DNA?”
She scribbled in her pad, in plain view. “Likes to be identified as abnormal,” she wrote.
“It would help me understand you better if I saw your blog.” She opened the blog and she immediately was taken aback.
“Dirty pictures of pregnant woman?”
“No, no. It is just a humorous article on how to have fun at a gynecologists office”
She paid no attention and scrolled down quickly glancing through the articles. “Another article on pregnancy.. hmm.. how many times did you write about pregnant woman in the recent past?”
“A few times,” TD said meekly.
“Man having fun at gynecologist. Dirty pictures of pregnant women. Let me ask you, do women in the gynecologists room turn you on?”
“WHAT? What the …”
“Are pregnant woman your fetish?
Twisted DNA sat upright, horrified. “NO!” he shouted, “how the hell did you make that inference?”
She said nothing but scribbled on her pad again: “Pregnant women is an emotional subject for patient.” Without lifting her eyes from the pad, she spoke sternly, “Please don’t read my notes.” She put a hand on the notes to hide them.
She continued the interview. “So your readers, do they have similar interests?” she asked, carefully selecting the word “interests”.
Irritated, Twisted DNA lashed out, “Don’t insult my readers. Most of them are women with children.”
Dr. Smith said nonchalantly, “Are you saying they were all pregnant at one time?”
TD found no words to respond. He buried his face in his hands and stared at her vacantly.
She continued, “Are you attracted to your readers?”
Waving his hands frantically, TD shouted, “NO NO!”
It was as if those words never reached Dr. Smith. She continued, “It seems their accusation of your being is weird may not be completely groundless.”
She scribbled something in the pad. As she put the pen back, she dropped it on the floor. It presented a good opportunity for TD to read the notes when Dr. Smith bent down to retrieve the pen. As he stood up to read the notes, Dr. Smith suddenly looked up. Her face turned red. She clutched her blouse closer and shouted, “Are you checking out my maternity bra?”
Twisted DNA dropped on his knees and begged. “Dr. Smith, I don’t know how to convince you. My writing about pregnancy means nothing. It’s just an easy topic to write humorously. At least read rest of the blog.”
She seemed a little convinced. She let go of the paperweight she was holding and proceeded to read rest of the blog. She read for a few minutes, her face very serious, which in itself was an insult for what was purported to be a humor blog. To add injury she asked, “Do you use any illegal drugs?”
“No,” answered TD.
“So you produced all this while you were completely conscious.”
“Yes”
“All those Pee-etiquette, Indian-Spider man, Pregnancy advice and rest of the, um.. humor, you wrote consciously and willingly?”
“Yes”
Dr. Smith spoke with a surprised look on her face, “I have seen so many people in my career. Boy, you are the weirdest!”
Twisted DNA sighed in relief. Weird is so much better than pervert. He asked, “All I want to know is, if I will ever be normal”
She said, with a sympathy filled tone, “Mr. DNA. Looking at your work so far, I am sorry to say there is no hope for you. You will be weird for the rest of your life.”
Twisted DNA beamed with delight. “Thank you! that’s all I wanted to know. I can blog forever.” He walked out a relieved man.
55 Responses to “Call me weird”
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Passing Thoughts
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[+] Kake Hudson is being sued for stealing an idea to make hair products out of volcanoes. You heard it right, volcanic ash. When asked why she used volcanic ash, she said, “You saw people in Pompeii right? Their hair stayed the same for 2000 years!” [0 comments]
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You are weird!
:P
phew!!
i was really getting worried if you would indeed be pronouced as normal!!
naah! i wasnt!! :p
cheers!
abha
Lol! You know, there is a difference between weird and funny. You’re just funny
I was wondering how tht meeting was proceeding!
I thought she’d quit working as a psychiatrist after reading your blog!!
Cheers!
U went for a confirmation? Insecure? YOU?
You are weird of course…
and your readers like it that way. It is a case for Dr.Becky Smith to check the “weirdity” level of the readers !!!
That was funny alright..
And what were you seriously taking a peek at the notes TD?…
Remain Twisted…
Thank god you are weird, otherwise we would be missing all these fun filled humour posts
yippess.. dat Rita skeeter didnt ask you to change– you could be like this forever!!
Love your weirdness!!
Thank god for that!
Thank God… You are not normal…
lol.
The second last sentence is the best one
Please keep blogging
wasn’t she stating the obvious? should have asked me…wait mental is not my specialty….
Good that there is hope for you.
Or was the doc weird?
-Nikhil
hahaha… Glad she confirmed your thots…. wierd n wacko !!! : )
Yayyyyy!! Yayyyy!!!
Long live TD…. may u blog forever.
Phewwwwwwwwww!!!! It was a Suspense Thriller man….It Can be better called as a Horror Movie….So scary…Wht happens next..what happenz next….Damn!!!
But, it was absolutely wonderfull show filled up wid all the 9 elements required…Fear, Anxiety, Romance (when the Pen dropped)….etc …. ROFL!!!!
Thx dear god…u saved our Dear Blogger TD!!!
Long Live TD…Long Live Humour!!!
Cheers bud
KaLyAn!!!
LOL! - good for u! i hope u keep churning out the funny posts!
Abhinav:
You are weird!
That was quick
Abha:
naah! i wasnt!!
Very sure that I am not normal huh. Thanks for the confidence.
D:
You’re just funny
I know you mean it as a compliment, so I will accept it
Venkatdeep:
I thought she’d quit working as a psychiatrist after reading your blog
Haha! You mean, she would go to counseling herself
How do we know:
U went for a confirmation? Insecure? YOU?
Lol. Ya sometimes we need reassurance
Srikanth:
“weirdity” level of the readers
Lol, nice word. Ya, I wonder what does it say about the people who are reading the blog!
Rahul:
And what were you seriously taking a peek at the notes TD?…
Man, no one trusts me! Or you all know way too much about me
Dinesh:
Thank god you are weird
And promise to remain that way
Reema:
didnt ask you to change
Like it’s in my control
Love your weirdness!!
Thank you
desigirl:
Thank god for that!
He he.. it will only get weirder
akilan:
Thank God… You are not normal…
Oh, thank you for your kind compliments
Urv:
Please keep blogging
That you don’t have to ask… you will have to beg me to stop
La Vida Loca:
should have asked me…
What is the use if you and I compliment each other with “you are weird.” We need an outside opinion
wait mental is not my specialty….
Well, if you can talk to me for one hour without running, it might as well be
Nikhil Narayanan:
Good that there is hope for you.
Lol, ya there is hope!
Aaarti:
wierd n wacko !!!
Oh you flatter me
Prats:
may u blog forever.
You know what they say… watch what you wish for, it might just come true
Kalyan:
It was a Suspense Thriller man….
Haha
It Can be better called as a Horror Movie
That would be when I put my picture up
Romance (when the Pen dropped)
ROFL
Long Live Humour!!!
I would drink to that. Where we would all be without it!
Mish:
i hope u keep churning out the funny posts!
Churning I will do, funny – let’s hope
I am not buying this. Did u actually go to a psychiatrist or u just wrote it just to make us all laugh?
Oooops…one more prats out here??? And I thought I had just come in here to read the post….thank god ! I had thought I was the only weird one…now I have some company…
but i’m glad with the docs diagnosis…you can atleast blog for a few years more…
Wait! Isn t being a weirdo a special trademark? it makes ppl remember u vividly :p
I have to say I appreciate your effort at replying at each and every single commentator on your blog. Not many popular bloggers do this. It is very respectable and I like it.
been a while since I read your blog. But I’m now up to date
!!
stay wierd. peace out ‘V’
You had to pay that person to hear just that you were weird! Hmm.. you really need therapy!
That doctor was way too normal.. that was the problem actually.
Ladybird:
Did u actually go to a psychiatrist
Of course I did. Why would I write lies on the blog!
By the way, I have a few plots on the moon I would like to sell. You wanna buy?
prats:
Oooops…one more prats out here???
Haha, I thought the earlier prats was you! But looks like he is the real “prats” because he has the domain prats.co.in!
I had thought I was the only weird one…now I have some company…
Oh the feeling is mutual
lalitha:
it makes ppl remember u vividly :p
Lol ya. People do remember me more than I want them to – and they only remember the bad things
Dinesh:
I have to say I appreciate your effort at replying at each and every single commentator
Probably I reply because I appreciate each and every commentator
Not many popular bloggers do this
I know. That’s why I am happy not being popular
Ravi:
been a while since I read your blog
That’s inexcusable! I am going to email you and remind you to read from time to time
stay wierd. peace out ‘V’
Totally. I am quite peaceful being weird – I don’t know about the people around me
Sudipta Chatterjee:
you really need therapy!
bluespriite:
That doctor was way too normal..
Lol. Ya, next time I should choose an equally weird doctor
>>I have a few plots on the moon I would like to sell. You wanna buy?
LOL..this is funnier than the blog!!
>>As he stood up to read the notes,
May be she would have understood you better if you explained your konga paita kuchulu post?
Yeah right..and the Dog ate your homework? LOL
Sanjay.
Well, thats a relief. I must admit I’ve wondered where we’d go for our daily dose of weirdness should you ever decide to shut shop!!!
You Actually Paid to see a Shrink!!
Its obvious , why do u need advise?????
LOL
bwahahaha!
This was hilarious! Be this weird forever TD! Coz we love reading the way you write now!
You have a nice blog here man!
:D Ouch… Did she ask about your readers? You should have told her…
Wierds of the same feather blog together
hehehe…
Like someone said, ‘Weird is Wonderful’…
Hiya TD! How r u?!
I m so so so GLAD; that u r NEVER going to be NORMAL gain
u shud jus blog forever! Mr. weird!
neways.. i had always thought y in the whole ‘dictionary’ of weird names.. di du ever choose to ‘invent’ “TWISTED DNA”
but i like it
it is weird
take care weirdo … nah not calling u pervert
…Now I understand …I bumped in Dr. Smith and she has vowed to quit her profession and never ever to have kids again…
Both your posts had me laughing away …keep writing:-)))
So what is this, a disguised apolification or a justology for the previous post(s)?
You didn’t mention the shrink asked you to promise your readers some not-so-kinky posts as therapy…..I heard her, I was there arranging the magazines on the rack….
-g
san:
LOL..this is funnier than the blog
Hmm… I choose to see the good in the statement and ignore the bad
the Dog ate your homework?
It really did! How did you know!
May be she would have understood you better if you explained your konga paita kuchulu post?
Ya, that would be the fastest way to prove the weirdness
the mad momma:
I must admit I’ve wondered where we’d go for our daily dose of weirdness should you ever decide to shut shop
He he he. That’s not going to happen. Even if I did, I will make sure you send you emails everyday with weird rants
Arvind:
Its obvious , why do u need advise
Haha, thanks for the vote of confidence
The Mahathma:
bwahahaha!
:)
~nm:
Be this weird forever TD
He he, can’t help it
Elfy:
You have a nice blog here man!
Thank you. You have a nice name
whatsinaname:
Wierds of the same feather blog together
Hard to believe but I don’t really wear any feathers
Sudar:
Like someone said, ‘Weird is Wonderful’…
Who? who? I will frame the quote
Veens:
u shud jus blog forever! Mr. weird!
Mr. Weird is a nice name too. I will keep it as a backup
di du ever choose to ‘invent’ “TWISTED DNA”
I don’t even have to try to be weird
Lol. Some brilliant thoughts just come as a flash to me
but i like it
Now I am so used to being called TD, I am afraid I might sign my real emails with those initials 
Me too
take care weirdo … nah not calling u pervert
Hehe, that’s much better.
Anu:
I bumped in Dr. Smith and she has vowed to quit her profession
ROFL! I have to believe you. I have that affect on some people!
gauri:
So what is this, a disguised apolification or a justology for the previous post(s)
None. Just a random babbling in half sleep under some influence of substances I am not supposed to name
the shrink asked you to promise your readers some not-so-kinky posts
Haha! I must have ignored her. It’s like asking me not to breath!
I was there arranging the magazines on the rack
Ah, you were next in line? Don’t blame it on this blog
Time for your head to go between your knees:)
Paro:
Time for your head to go between your knees
You pervert!! Oh wait, you mean, between my legs not somebody else’s. Right. I should get to it!
If you weren’t weird, you wouldn’t be any fun to read
keep up the good work, cheers!
keep up the weirdness!!! TD
:D
Meh, these psychiatrists are sooo screwed up. They’ve read enough to know they’re screwed up, but don’t know enough to fix themselves.
But I’ll still agree with her diagnosis - you are, sir, delightfully weird!
Oh, and here’s a groaner I came up with:
He’s so twisted his DNA looks straight.
A lesson in logic -
Premise:
A. All bloggers are wierdos.
B. All wierdos don’t blog.
Inference:
Only wierdos blog!
Glad to be one of them! Waiting to see more such ‘enlightening’ posts!
From one wierdo to another!
TD Wierdo ki Jai!
You’re NOT attracted to us? How dare you!
dude we are as relieved as you are..keep up the weird stuff!!!!!
i was wondering how it would end
next time get Mrs Twisted DNA to accompany you to Dr Smith
You have been awarded. Please visit my blog and collect your award
Dear Twisted DNA, Please come back , we are missing your weird posts!
Hey, nice to see that you haven’t changed a bit… have been a bit busy, haven’t had time to catch up with blogs. How are you doing.
Weird weird weird!
then if u r not weird how lese do u expect to blog!
each one in its own world!
u are normally weird and if u turn normal tht will make u abnormally normal *wide grin*
great blogging
blog on forever!