Monthly Archive for January, 2008

So you are going to Europe

This is an old post I wrote when we were going to Europe several years ago. I have to recycle posts because I am busy the Hollywood writer’s strike is on.


If you are a desi planning a trip to Europe, here is what you can expect:• Your wife will buy 4 tops, 3 pants and 2 pairs of shoes “for the trip,” even though she is only planning to pack 2 tops, 2 pants and 1 pair of shoes.• Some friends of yours will give you advice that will give Rick Steves’s “Europe Through Backdoor” a run for its money. The advice includes, “Pack a lot of murukulu or jantikalu so you can save some money on breakfast.”

• People will express their condolences because you won’t be eating rice for two or three weeks. They will question your patriotism for claiming you can survive happily on sandwiches and pasta for several weeks and provide unwanted counsel, “Pack a rice cooker, rice and some lentils so you can easily cook Indian food whenever you want.”

• Your wife will tell you, “Please please bring some nice clothes. Everybody in Europe dresses well and you will stick out in your shabby jeans.” Also, she will point out why none of the clothes you own fit the bill and take you to Macy’s and insist that you buy the pink shirt with yellow flowers.

• People who visited Europe before will question your intelligence because you are covering only 4 cities in 2 weeks instead of 15 cities across 6 countries.

• If you don’t have kids, all relatives will assume you will be planning kids soon after the trip and make their plans accordingly. Such as, your MIL saying, “I am visiting Turupathi right now, who knows I may have to be in the US in less than a year.”

• You will learn a few broken Spanish sentences and practice them on the office janitor.

• At least one of your desi friends will ask you how much the total trip will cost and roll their eyes. You can clearly see that they are thinking, “You idiots! You can buy a piece of land for that money in India!”

• You master the pronunciation of “Chamonix Mont Blanc” and demonstrate to a French friend. After half hour of demonstrating your pronunciation, you will end up writing it on the whiteboard for him to understand it.