Tadget gag

Anuradha tagged me with the Gadget tag. The rules are simple, you need to talk about 3 fantasy gadgets you would like to have and tag more people.

When I was young, I wouldn’t have to think for a second what gadgets I want. I would’ve told you in one breath: water-to-wine-converter, 2000-hour-TiVo and a woman-prettying-goggles (in case the wine didn’t work). But I am a grumpy, mumbling old man now. All I ask is that the damn gadgets, I paid good money for, work.

Here is my fantasy.

1. Microwave Oven: Microwave oven is a machine that heats a portion of the food that is kept in it. To me it is a miracle how half the food is boiling hot and the rest is still frozen. Don’t even get me started on the sensor cooking feature. It is just a short for “For people who still don’t get it.” My fantasy is a microwave that doesn’t need to be spoon-fed.

2. Bathroom Scale. Either our house has utter disregard for Newtonian physics or our bathroom scale is a lemon. Move the scale ever so slightly, it gives you a new weight. Come on! I can’t be gaining and losing weight every step I take. If that were true, I should be looking like a badly animated cartoon character when I walk. My fantasy is a bathroom scale that respects physics.

3. Paper Shredder: When I bought my first paper shredder, I bought a manual shredder. Little did I know that “Manual Paper Shredder” means I have to shred the paper manually, with my own hands. So I bought an Electronic paper shredder. From what I understand so far, it only shreds electronic documents. My fantasy is a paper shredder that shreds real paper and not cause side-effects such as a sudden urge to bang your head against the wall

I tag:

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40 Responses to “Tadget gag”  

  1. 1 priya

    That was a good one. It reminds me how we used to go for new products when they comeout. A mini TV in fridge, plasma and new gadgets.

    The gadgets you have mentioned are all needed in NA. If you have a power cut, do you think we can cook anything else.

    I know the bathroom scale keeps us hanging when we wanna know its + or -.

    Paper shredder with a robot shud work auto.

  2. 2 Shadow in the Moonlight

    The water to wine converter… you got some imagination there. Anyway, pretty interesting blog… had fun reading it. Liked the post titled Booked, had me in splits.

  3. 3 La vida Loca

    bathroom scales that always shows the weight u want to be..yea:)

  4. 4 Shreemoyee

    :) nice choice of gadgets.

  5. 5 OrangeJammies

    lol! my fantasy gadget would definitely be bathroom scales……talking ones. that tell me “of course not! who says you’re fat?” everytime i hop on.

    I’m also a little in love with automatic car starters, but since I don’t live in snowy Upstate New York/ Pennsylvania/ Boston anymore, and, more relevantly, don’t drive in Bombay, it’s a little redundant.

  6. 6 Shilpa

    yep, def the scale for me, too. something that senses your trepidation before you step on it. a typical dialogue with your bathroom scale:
    b.s. (no pun intended): don’t be afraid! come on over!!
    me: err.. are u sure? are u giving me bad news??
    b.s.: just STEP ON IT already!!!
    me: yikes.. ok (now on scale in mortal fear)
    b.s.: and there you are - you’re still a fantastic 120 lbs., but you’re KILLING ME NOW!!! shed off the cellulite and come back in 2 years.

  7. 7 White Forest

    “Bathroom Scale. Either our house has utter disregard for Newtonian physics or our bathroom scale is a lemon.”

    lolz…gud one !

  8. 8 Keshi

    interesting choice.

    I was thinking u needes a MW that cooks w.o. having to burn down the house ;-)

    Keshi.

  9. 9 itchingtowrite

    good one.. u seem to be a very practical person
    manufacturers really need to make more people friendly gadgets!!

  10. 10 Rohini

    If you do find a good bathroom scale that is accurate and attractive, drop me a line. I’ve been looking for ages… have been reduced to weighing myself during visits to the paediatrician’s office.

  11. 11 Neha

    Thank God ma shredder is much better!!
    And I too need a micro wave oven, i mean the one which just reads our mind as to what exactly we wanna do with the food and act accordingly!
    Most of the times I am staring at the buttons wondering which ones to press!

  12. 12 chandni

    I want water to beer converter!

  13. 13 Perspective Inc.

    totally with you on the microwave..

  14. 14 OrangeJammies
  15. 15 chitra

    May all your wishes (inclusive of the one u had wanted when u were younger) be granted !!!

    It would be fun for us equally!!

  16. 16 Yashita

    lol…u need to read the MW manual:p…actually I find it quite funny too..try heating kachori in Microwave…if u go by the temp of the kachori, u’d think it still needs some more heating…and after only a few seconds u start seein black smoke risin from ur lovely kachori:)the inside is HOT while the outside is cold!…now I use the try-and-error method!

    and well…I have stopped trustin those things called weight machines…every damn machine shows a diff wt!

  17. 17 Yashita

    hehehe…I read ur post below…I think U really need someone to cook for u:p…and they thot MW’s are supposed to be god sent for the men!!!! do u cook btw?something tells me u will need a step by step guide on how to boil an egg:p

  18. 18 Sush

    That was W to W converter was trulyimaginative and the rest are what everyone needs I guess. I like the way you tackle the tags…. pics and all.

  19. 19 MellowDrama

    Hahha nice post and I couldn’t agree with you more. Tho I am sure I would give the weighing scales a miss:) Gimme an oven that doesn’t burn my cake to a frizzle and leave the middle soggy wet..aargh. Tho I still cherish the secret hope of getting the ideal voice recongition software - one that I don’t have to spend a month configuring!

    5:15 AM
    Delete

  20. 20 Anu

    Paper shredder, fax machines, photocopiers, printers….. nightmares, each one of them.
    /*side-effects such as a sudden urge to bang your head against the wall*/
    Been there, done that.
    I don’t think Im capable of working with anything that is paper. :)

  21. 21 gauri

    Hey NAD,

    From someone who shares your sentiments about the microwave: while you’re at it, could you ask for a stirrer-cum-splatter-bouncer to be suspended from the ceiling of the microwave? That way the darned gadget stops midway, the stirrer intervenes and tunrs the scathing hot under the freezing cold and the MW resumes action. While the turntable’s at work, it assumes the role of a ping-pong bat and parries the splutter right back into the bowl. (And if not-so-SHARP or GE actually come up with this and claim their fame, you can show off that they read your blog ;) )

  22. 22 starry nights

    I am with you on the bathrom scale. I think this happens to every one. Beware of putting a spoon of instant coffee into a mug of boiling water because it splutters and has burned many a face.

  23. 23 Keshi

    needed*** duhhhh!

    :)
    Keshi.

  24. 24 Twisted DNA

    priya:
    You got a pretty good list there yourself :)
    If we lose power in NA, we are pretty much dead in the water!
    paper shredder with a robot is a good idea. We can use hte robot to shred the paper shredder ;)

    shadow in the moonlight:
    Very nice user name :)
    My imagination works quite well when it comes to wine :)

    la vida loca:
    That’s a good idea. There could be a lot of demand for such scale!

    shreemoyee:
    Thank you

    orangejammies:
    “Talking ones. that tell me “of course not! who says you’re fat?” everytime i hop on.”
    Aren’t they called husbands? ;)

    shilpa:
    ROFL. You GOT TO put it up on your blog! It’s so funny.

    white forest:
    Thanks :)

    keshi:
    I need a microwave that cuts the vegetables, add salt, cooks the food and puts it on the plate for me :) I can’t be trusted with any of those tasks

    itchingtowrite:
    “u seem to be a very practical person”
    Nah, I am just old :)

    rohini:
    LOL@weighing at the ped. office. That’s a great idea, why didn’t I think of that before :)

    neha:
    “And I too need a micro wave oven, i mean the one which just reads our mind as to what exactly we wanna do with the food and act accordingly!”
    Yes, it is known as a restaurant :)

    chandni:
    May be you should ask for a “PUR” water filter kind of gadget that directly plugs into faucet and converts water as it comes out of the faucet! That would be awesome :)

    perspective inc:
    We need to start People Against Microwaves club :)

    chitra:
    I can imagine how the water-to-wine convert can cause everybody some amusement :)

    yashita:
    MW Manual? I don’t even believe the manual describes the same product that it shipped with!
    LOL@heating kachori! YOu are so right. That happens to me all the time with coffee! It’s ice cold one second and exploseive the next
    I might be able to manage to boil an egg, but my wife would never trust me with it :)

    sush:
    Oh thank you!

    mellowdrama:
    oven? I never felt adventurous enough hto touch an oven. I don’t think I even understand what exactly it does ;)

    anu:
    “I don’t think Im capable of working with anything that is paper”
    You are an eGirl :)

    gauri:
    ROFL. You need to find a job as a product designer :) Stirrer is an awesome idea.

    LOL@not-so-SHARP

    starry nights:
    Ya, I saw a video where a uy microwaves water and puts coffee in it it kind of explodes. Microwave not only makes me crazy, but it also makes the waater crazy :)

  25. 25 Keshi

    u have got such a MW already. Ur wife.

    Keshi.

  26. 26 Wolfsong

    Water-to-wine converter definitely sounds awesome! The scale - I wish my gym had one of those! I think I’d love a microwave oven that would convert a cup of water into whatever I feel like eating! Since I’m never in the mood to cook (can put a cup of water in though) but always in the mood to eat, this is one thing I would love to have! Your blog is fun to read! Drop by mine when you have time!

  27. 27 OrangeJammies

    @TD: Wrong. They’re called boyfriends. And it’s amazing what a little training can do. The reaction time between “do i look fat?” and “of course not!” shrinks significantly…

  28. 28 Twisted DNA

    keshi:
    Good idea. I will just tell her that “Keshi said you need to all that” ;)

    wolfsong:
    You are worse than me ;) If you did get such gadget, get one for me too :D

    orangejammies:
    Haha. That sounds like a nice concept for a video game. Wife character keeps asking questions and you get points by how fast you can respond with the correct answer :) Oh wait, that sounds like a marriage ;)

  29. 29 Bishu

    Man,share the same agony about Microwaves and Weight machines.Yet to experience the shredder machine.In office it is a box where we dump papers to be shredded probably by some outsourced vendor in undisclosed location.In case I find out the technique would drop you a note.

  30. 30 Aparna

    Mine would certainly be:
    (1) A small almost invisible locator, which I could put on all the things I keep misplacing and use a beeper to locate them all
    (2) A “ctrl F” kinda thing for all the technical hard copy books I read.
    (3) A robot housekeeper.. which cooks like a dream (I suck at cooking)

  31. 31 Yashita

    hehehe…there! we don’t have to worry about u burnin the house down now:)…and I agree with Keshi!

  32. 32 Prasad

    :) good pickings. I will get to it soon, presently I have been very busy to make any blog entries and also add my 11 day moratorium on not updating (see the latest post) too. Thanks for the tag - I will work on it.

    -P

  33. 33 Keshi

    awwww I didnt say that. U did hahaha!

    Keshi.

  34. 34 harshavardhan reddy

    the paper shredder thing was funny.

  35. 35 sharda

    So far I have tried 3 paper shredder,cost range from $20 - $130.
    None of them worked for more than 4-5 months.And finally I do it manually with my hands.Such a pity :(

  36. 36 Jamie

    I’ll get around to it. I promise!!!

  37. 37 drama diva

    I want .. I want … I want
    1. GPS (as if we can use it in Malaysia.
    2. a new digital camera a “Sony CyberShot DSC-T9″ will do
    3. and last but not least, a 360degree adjustable Laptop

    woohoo…

  38. 38 Lera

    Hi Twisted DNA, your Gadget fantasy sounds fun to read! though ,survival Gadget for geeks , would be more appropriate..
    The world is changing fast & I’m sure, it’s not gonna take long to get all the state-of-the-art devices you aspire …..:)

  39. 39 Twisted DNA

    bishu:
    I feel for the people of the shredding company. Imagine having to do it for a living!

    aparna:
    “(2) A “ctrl F” kinda thing for all the technical hard copy books I read.”
    Awesome idea! I miss Ctrl+F so much when reading hard copies!

    “(3) A robot housekeeper.. which cooks like a dream (I suck at cooking)”
    Get a husband if you need to and train him :)

    yashita:
    Haha. On a side note, if you eat my cooking, you would wish that I burnt down the house instead :)

    prasad:
    I noticed that you haven’t been updating. As you must have noticed, I liked your ads blog because it deserves lot more viewers than it is getting

    keshi:
    Either way she won’t mind :) By now she is quite used to my poking fun at her :)

    harshavardhan reddy:
    Thanks :)

    Sharda:
    The only way to shred papers is to buy a copier ;)

    jamie:
    Waiting…

    drama diva:
    You are quite practical aren’t you? I hope your Mr. Right is reading it :)

    lera:
    I am sure things will improve. But I don’t know about shredder though! It’s not like it’s a new concept… they have been making them for years but still they can’t get them right!

  40. 40 jorge

    hola soy jorge y los quiero

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